Before we move on to another topic-including another long-overdue site review-we would like to invite you to answer a few questions about the preceding content in your journal. Please remember that these questions are merely guidelines; if you find any of them frightening or feel overwhelmed at the prospect of thinking about a particular topic, skip it. All we are really asking is for you to use your journal to integrate your thoughts, ideas and feelings about how your life and pain have been affected by the issues raised in these articles.
However, before we pose the questions to you, we would like to introduce you to a new relaxation technique.
It is called "Softening the Belly"-because that is exactly what you do. It is a means of both allowing yourself to breathe more deeply, and a way of releasing the tightness we all experience in our body's core muscles when we feel pain, stress, anger, or fear. It is a more profound way of letting go than simple deep breathing, but just as easy to do.
The following is a description of "soft belly" practice as told to an interviewer by Stephen Levine. (If you would like to read the entire interview, click here. )
"You start soft belly by physically letting each inward breath that you breath push the belly out. No more holding the belly. You physically open, letting the muscles soften, letting the tissue soften. In the beginning, you may even push your belly out a little, just to let it know it can go out, that it doesn’t have to take half a breath. You start to breath in to your belly, which is quite a wonderful experience. One foot on the ground may be that we take our breath only into the top third of our body. Eventually, you’ll be able to breath out the bottom of your feet, so to speak, without even trying."
"......You practice softening and begin to notice that, although your intention is to soften, there is something hard there. Your heart decides it is time to face that which has caused you to turn away from life. You start allowing thoughts, and they can come and go. You make space around thoughts, moment to moment, every exhale letting go. In the course of this, you find out what letting go means. One of the extraordinary things about soft belly practice is that it is a physical trigger for the mental state of letting go. People lose their breath when they’re watching death or during a moment of anger. That’s the time to practice soft belly. ...In softening the belly, you let space be there and thoughts and feelings pass through like bubbles. You don’t stop anything. Let it all flow. The difference between my pain and the pain is the space it floats in. "
Pretty simple, No? Yet you will be quite surprised when you experience how much more deeply relaxed you feel after practicing this technique for a few minutes. In fact, why not try it before you move on to the questions below. When you feel deeply relaxed (not sleepy!) begin your journaling session by setting your intention; ask your subconscious a specific question which conveys the kind of help and guidance you would like in the journaling process. Ask your question 3 times, remembering to listen in between each one for any answers. Then, when you are ready, begin journaling.
Question 1. Have I been in situations in the past where I have felt victimized ? If your answer is "yes" how, by whom and under what circumstances? Describe the situation, but also try to capture the experience in terms of how it made you feel.
Question 2. What feelings do I still carry with me related to this experience?
Question 3. How do I believe this experience affected me and the decisions and choices I made about my life prior to today?
Question 4. What actions can I take to relieve my heart and soul of any feelings I still hold there about this experience?
When you are finished answering the questions, put your journal away, or close your computer and relax for a while. These kinds of questions are difficult to answer; even if you have gone over this situation and these feelings in your mind hundreds of times, it is a very different experience to let them out where you can see them. Do not be surprised if you feel tired afterward. Allow yourself the space to feel your emotions, but try not dwell on them. Practice letting go.
Let some time (a day or so ) pass, and then go back to your journal and read your answers again to see if any new insights appear. Write these down in your journal with your original answers.
Remember, as we said on our web site, this is hard work; but it is worth every second you spend on it.
Thank you for trusting us to help you on this journey.
]]>This Christmas......